Advice, Inspiration, Self-love

The Power of Choice

 

I had an epiphany when I came across the statement; “choosing to not make a choice, is a choice in itself”. It made me rethink my past; considering where I blamed others for an experience, when in actual fact it was me who had allowed it. So no-one else was to blame, but me… That then took me on a whole new negative journey; blaming myself instead of others.Mind Power

Fortunately with extra life experience, books, movies and therapy, I came to the conclusion that using words with negative connotations rarely produces anything positive in your life. Now when rethinking the above, I choose to replace the word “blame” with “responsible”; so no-one else was responsible, but me.

Taking ownership of all that happens in your LIFE is empowering in itself, even if the results aren’t entirely favourable. It’s amazing how a shift in thinking can alter your sentiment with regards to any situation and give rise to a totally different emotional response. We relinquish our power when, consciously or unconsciously, we allow others to steer our lives. The same goes for just letting life happen because in doing so, you render yourself helpless.The Adult

It’s a bit difficult rethinking what you could have done as a child because your PARENTS were in charge and they made all the decisions. You didn’t really have any power over what happened, but now your power lies in how you choose to view those choices that were made for you.

Caregivers choose to do what they think is best for you at the time. People of yesteryear questioned less and were more accepting of authoritarian figures. This conditioning led to automatic decision making, based on old mindsets passed on from previous generations, so even though circumstances had changed, often the responses did not. Breaking this cycle, with out of the box thinking, was very difficult because you had to challenge all that you were taught. The youth of today can speak up for themselves more easily, challenging those in charge, especially if what’s happening to them is deemed oppressive because there is more recourse.

Three ChoicesMaking life choices is trying at the best of times and having the responsibility of doing so for others, is even worst. Fortunately there’s a positive to every negative thought or feeling. If little people are under your care, then you have been gifted with a great opportunity to equip them with the necessary skills to make smart personal choices. You can start to inculcate decision making from a very young age by allowing them to decide on what to wear or how to spend their saving. Yes, these may be very simple decisions, but the experience of being responsible and learning to take charge of your own choices will greatly benefit them in the future.

DecisionsAs adults we are all faced with tough decisions and indecisiveness can be very overwhelming and stressful. The inability to make calculated choices for ourselves can be draining and that may lead us to allow others to take charge. This can result in major problems which can be emotionally stifling and even crippling later on in life.

Coffee Not CrackIf you’re lucky enough to come from a background where you obtained all the necessary skills to make your own decisions, then you’ll be in a position to live a life without regret because you’re able to take ownership of all that’s happening in your life. Should this not be the case and you find yourself pondering what you would have done differently if given a do-over, you could find yourself stuck in a horrible place filled with self-doubt and regret.

Question Lifes DecisionsDo not fret if you’re in an unhappy place, questioning all that you’ve done thus far. From this comes personal growth, but only if you take the time to FORGIVE yourself and others for past experiences. Evaluate your current situation and know that you can choose to do whatever makes you happy at anytime. It’s never too late. You’ll need to weigh all the pros and cons to establish what is and will be most beneficial to you in the long run. Your emotional happiness and mental sanity depends on it.

You’ll have a whole lot to contemplate if you’re sitting with a work or RELATIONSHIP conundrum. Children will definitely complicate these decisions. Many parents make detrimental decisions considering what they think is best for their children. What they fail to realize is that, what’s good for them is most probably best for their children as well because a happy person makes for a happy parent. The task of making life changing decisions is not always easy. It may take some sacrifice; maybe even relinquishing some creature comforts you’ve become accustom to.

Wrong Career ChoiceWhether you’re stuck in a job that’s unrewarding or in a relationship that is unfulfilling, questioning all your life’s choices or lack thereof, it’s good to reflect on how all these things came about. We need to question what criteria forms the bases of our decision making. It’s imperative that we consciously weigh all the information at hand before drawing to any conclusions, including: how we feel, what we know to be true and have learned from experience. This is often not the case, especially when life seems too chaotic. That’s when we find ourselves reverting to autopilot choices or procrastination because the whole process feels like too much of an effort. Many people fear making changes to remedy their situations because they are afraid of making the wrong choice. Valuable lessons often come from what we perceive to be a “wrong life choice” because it resulted in a bad experience or situation, but that may be the very catalyst needed to lead you to your blissful state. You have to be willing to take a chance and sometimes your safest choice is not always the best choice, but that is still your choice because you’re the one who will have to live with the consequences. 

Lifes ChoicesAlways doing things to please others opens a whole can of worms. By doing so you lose yourself and afterwards you may not even be able to identify what you love, want or makes you happy. To ensure your happiness you have to believe in doing what’s best for you because you are deserving of everything good in this life. If you’ve always been a ‘people-pleaser’, then this change in attitude will be met with resistance. The people close to you or that you come into contact with on the daily will start to question: “Who is this person?” and “What happened to the person we knew?”. Arguments will ensue. Just be calm. Explain your position. If they respect, love and care about you, then they will understand and come to terms with your new disposition. If not, then they are not worthy of your time or energy! You are in control. You always have a choice. This is your power and your HAPPINESS does count. You can’t please or make everyone else happy all of the time, so why not choose to please and make yourself happy instead.

Happiness


Fact :

dog walkingDogs are most likely to run to you on your return and this is often interpreted as love and affection. Part of that reason may be because they are solely dependent on you.

kitten exploringCats are more likely to do things on their own and just because they may not run to your side, doesn’t necessarily mean that they are cold or unfeeling. They’re just minglers and explorers.


Affirmation :Oswald Happy Rabbit

I choose with love and my choices always steer me in the best direction possible.


Quote :Good Or Bad

You are the TOTAL SUM of all your LIFE CHOICES…


Inspiration :

BOOK
My Sister’s Keeper
by Jodi Picoult
Genre : Novel / Domestic Fiction

MOVIE
Groundhog Day
Time : 1hr 41min
Genre : Drama/Fantasy

SONG

Power by Little Mix


Something Thought Provoking 🤔😏🧐😲

Please Make Time To Watch This

Advice, Inspiration, Love

A Birds Eye-view


We all have opinions with respect to what happens in our lives and all around us. These opinions are intensified depending on our experiences in various situations and how it impacts on us. There are also those individuals who are extremely opinionated even with regards to things which have no bearing on their lives at all. In some instances the very same people end up changing their minds when they find themselves facing different circumstances.Offended Opinion

I do believe that we are all entitled to our own opinions. This is a basic right. The lines do however get blurred when you start to impose your opinions on others. When it comes to guardianship, I do hope that you teach with an open mind.

Many of the social problems we are faced with today stem from closed mindedness. Why do people feel so compelled to have singularity in the world? The whole attitude of “this is the only way” or “my way is the right way” is problematic to say the least. Who are we to judge? Clearly you have to ask yourself one simple question: “What is the harm in it if it does not cause any harm?” This is in respect to race, religion, politics, social standing, sexual orientation and any other contentious issues.Inter-racial Colour-coordinated

How do you feel about inter-racial and inter-religious relationships; that whole idea of making sure that your religious heritage is not tainted or the protection of your race purity? This notion is often passed on from your parents or instilled by your community. Should you find yourself falling for someone outside of your race, religion or class, you will definitely be faced with many challenges. Like finding yourself in the precarious situation of questioning all that you thought to be true your entire life. How do you go about explaining or even defending yourself against the values you were made to believe to be righteous and necessary? I think the hardest of all would be when your sexual orientation is deemed as deviant. The whole coming to terms with who are and where Black & White Heart Handsyou find yourself is the most difficult. The shame of it all comes into play irrespective of which of these circumstances befall you.

What about abortion? You may be pro-life and judge all who have committed, in your opinion, this heinous act, but should you or someone dear to you be with child from say a rape, you could be of a different view point about carrying the child to term. Yes, you may say that she could give him/her up for adoption, but what about the psychological trauma that this women or girl must endure for the 9 months or even her entire life should she choose to rear the child. Would you consider that to be fair? Surely allowances need to be made and even if that’s not the case and someone feels the need to terminate their pregnancy, shouldn’t it be their choice? The person will have to live with their decision. It really is none of your business if it does not impact your life directly. So why do people then feel entitled to have a say?Pretty Birds Flying

Politics and religion have always been so intertwined. People feeling that they need to pick a side. “We are righteous and you are not”, the judgement of it all. That in itself is hypocritical because most religious teachings preach that we should not judge. Some people choose to take certain scriptures out of context or read far too literally into them because it is all a matter of interpretation. Unfortunately our world is filled with fundamentalist who fuel extremism, but I do believe that this cannot be what the majority of humankind is advocating for.

Does there have to be a right and a wrong? Why do people feel so uncomfortable with change and difference? How about RESPECTING everyone’s opinions and finding a compromise? There is such resistance to shifting ones’ viewpoint, but we all need to learn to step away from emotional situations and rise above them with empathy. Try visualizing yourself in the other persons’ shoes to better understand their point of view.

Hurtful BirdsImagine a world where people only got involved when an integral transgression is taking or took place. What camaraderie there would be, all fighting for the good of humanity as a whole; so none of those monolithic beliefs but only one of inclusivity.

The vision of people assisting one another instead of breaking each other down must be the most beautiful sight to behold; one where everyone is working towards the common goal of peace and prosperity, all trying to eradicate hurt, harm, conflict and despair.

Now that is a world I’d be proud to live in!

Earth Between Hands

Please help to create that world? 

All it takes is one person at a time espousing for it. Don’t try to change people’s minds. That will only spark arguments and fuel the fire of resistance to inclusion. Rather do so by making a subtle statement. If you encounter hostility, just say that it’s something you wish for. No-one can fight a wish. If that does not work, then change the subject. Just know that you put it out there. You planted the seed and that’s all that matters. Be sure to shed some light on this notion, should the chance arise. This will assist the idea to germinate and hopefully in time to come, there will be way more knowledgeable and broadminded people, too many to count, shading everyone from the hatred that now plagues our world.

Cute Bird FlyingWouldn’t it be grand if the BIRDS’ EYE-VIEW, when surveying our world, is one filled with love and compassion for our fellowman, where we all accept and embrace one-another every chance we get?


Fact :

Muddy HippoEmerging from mud baths, hippopotamus, will with a swirl of their tail, fling a mixture of their own urine and feces at each other as an act of humiliation as well as to mark their territory.


Jumping RainbowAffirmation :

I live in a world of love and acceptance!


Quote :
No One Is Born Hating - Nelson Mandela

Nelson Mandela “Tata Madiba”


Inspiration :

BOOK
Wrapped Up In You
by Carole Matthews
Genre : Drama/Romance Novel

MOVIE
The Big Sick
Time : 2 hrs
Genre : Drama/Romance

SONG

From A Distance by Bette Midler


Advice, Inspiration, Motivation, Personal Growth, Starting Over

Restart the Rest of Your Life Today

When you’ve been going through a rough patch or having a not so good life experience, people will often tell you that today or tomorrow is the “first day of the rest of your life”. I quite like the thought of that because you can now rethink and DECIDE on the type of life you really want to be living…Decide Your Life

Obviously there are some who may consider this notion absolutely ludicrous,

The 1st Day of your Life

but I implore you…  Please bear in mind that this thought  may be just what is needed to encourage a person to still have hope for tomorrow.

None the less, for all the cynics out there, who may take this notion all too literally, this cartoon clip is especially for you.

Now, back to the people who are on board with the topic at hand. It’s all well and good believing in the concept but how do you put it into practice?

What exactly are you to do? Get MAD? Get SAD? I say do whatever the hell you need to so that you are able to move on. I wouldn’t personally advocate Getting EVEN as this may be counterproductive and hold you back!

YOU ARE ALLOWED TO REMEMBER YOUR PAST!!! Whether it’s to commemorate or commiserate. Just don’t get stuck there!

TODAY

Your past experiences and thoughts help make you who you are, but that’s NOT all who you are. You are your potential, your dreams, your aspirations! And so much more…

Self Love

Everyone deserves a RENEWED lease on life or a fresh start from a bad past.

So my advice is to take the pressure and difficult situations in your life as best you can all the while remembering that from these experiences something beautiful will emerge… you only stronger and wiser!


Fact :Diamond jif

A diamond is basically compressed dirt put under immense heat & pressure.


Affirmation :Smiley Sun

I am worthy of the very best that life has to offer!


Inspiration :

BOOK
The Pursuit of Happyness
by Chris Gardner
Genre: Biography

MOVIE
The Pursuit of Happyness
Time: 145 min
Genre: Drama

SONG
Firework by Katy Perry